May 31, 2008
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Seriously.
This week we have two celebrities illustrating what is wrong with America today. These wonderful women, who are actually in fact tools, have done a lot to stick their feet in their mouths which is in fact a better performance than either of their last movies.
First we’ll start with the less-toolish of the two, Sharon Stone. The price of celebrity is not only will your idiotic statements matter, but on the off chance that you’re actually right, enormous pressure can be applied to you to make you retract your statement. She said, with all the right of an American who should be protected by the first amendement, that China was suffering from Karmic backlash. A little non-sensical, but with the build up to
Berlin 1936… I mean Bejing 2008 (It’s so hard to tell them apart… do we have Jesse Owens this year?) and the troops in Tibet it makes sence that a buddy of the Dali Lama just might pop off with a critical statement like that. But then China, who’s got like 95% of the money on the planet right now (that’s why I don’t contribute to the relief funds, they can afford to come here and buy some of those cheap-ass tents they sent us from our Big 5′s), shuts off sales of her movies. (Even the pirated ones, this would have thrilled Russia ten years ago…) So now we have an American citizen who’s voice is being directly stiffled by an autocratic regime, good job Bush, Clinton, Bush, and I presume Clinton! Way to bring China into the world community… we needed someone better at telling us how to groupthing, although I prefered Ingsoc.But is America any better? We come to the next has-been, Susan Sarandon, who says if John McCain is elected president she will leave the country and live in Europe. There are several problems here. First, is she campaigning for or against John McCain? I’ve asked several people around here and they believe that if the price of a McCain presidency is ridding us of Sarandon’s movies well damnit, it’ll be a sacrifice but SHE’S GOTTA GO! Second is the fact that it reinforces the Democratic Elite problem. Most Democrats are poor and middle-class people who have to stay no matter who the President is, but rather than staying and using her money and supposed stardom to play the conscious of America against this supposed great evil of a McCain administration her plan is to take her football and go to Europe. You sanctimonious, pompous, elitist twit. If you really felt that a McCain presidency was that bad, if you don’t stay and keep watch over it with those beliefs you are nothing less than a traitor to America. I have no problem with those that stay and bitch, but those that bitch and leave can stay the hell away for ever.
Anyway, the solution to both problems is the same: a Doug Glendower presidency. There’s space to write in my name, it’s ok. And it’s easier to spell than Obama and less confusing than trying to remember if you’re voting for Bill or Hillary. And if you really feel like throwing down for me, you can add “for life” after President, if you do, I’ll wear one of those cool uniforms like Peron did with the big-ass sunglasses!
Comments (2)
I think some of the problem people have with what Stone said is that the Chinese government didn’t get too badly hurt in the earthquake. Hell, they managed a PR victory and freed themselves from few thousand mouths to feed. Though it might sound a little tired by now, the Chinese people aren’t entirely to blame for what their government does. It’s not like they live in a democracy, after all.
Could not agree more on the Serandon thing.
@Alan_Nominus - Which is why I used the term “China” rather than the term “Chinese”, trying to emphasize that I am talking about the inordinate hold that this autocratic regime has over the world right now, and much of it is to blame on the last three administrations.